It is strange how the mechanics of things work yet however fasinated we may be, we never really do stop for one moment, pause for a little second, and look at our surroundings with a different perspective. Rushing to meet deadlines and fulfilling promises that we hope not to make empty... sometimes I just feel like dropping everything that I have right now and do the things I really want to do, not bothered by the stares and glares that people would have on me.
Today is my off day. Usually, I would have a number of things planned beforehand on what I would do on such days. Today was an exception. I wanted to be spontaneous and a little carefree. I didn't want to religiously follow something too structured such that any fun that I would have, would ultimately be somewhat a make-believed one. Ironic.
My mum asked me whether I wanted to go for my church's youth service tonight. I said no. Perhaps it is because of one really bad experience with my previous church's youth service that I am reluctant to embrace another youth service. Besides, I ain't that youthful anymore. The army has essentially sucked out any ounce of youth and vibrancy from their soldiers. Just look at any soldier on the streets. You see tired and somber faces. You see poignancy and a subtle cry for freedom inside their small little hearts. You see a lost in spirit and zest. The army's experience.
Love is like a drug. I wrote that in my Literature class when I was in Secondary Two when we were discussing about Love. I enjoyed literature lessons as it really brought out the character in me and the fervour for appreciation of true arts. I see one midget announcing to almost the whole world how wonderful he treats his girlfriend and how her girlfriend cherishes him. Some things are best kept secret. Some things are better off not said. While he thinks people love to hear his lala land stories, I on the other hand am not really that interested in him spinning endless tales about his personal relationships. I yearn to be in love someday. but I am somewhat hesitant. Perhaps it is because of how the relationships that I have seen around me didn't really end happily ever after, that results in this reluctance on my side. I am interested in a person. But a cat has caught my tongue. It is sometimes agonising but yet I tend to have a feeling that both of us know how we feel towards each other but we both are just waiting and waiting until one day one of us just says something. The waiting game torments people.
My Half-Blood Prince arrived in the mail. Can't wait to start reading it... I remembered seeing one obese guy squeezing into a seat on the train just so that he could read his new Harry Potter Book that he purchased from Popular. He was fixed on what he was reading and couldn't care less about anything else. I think he would even beat up a person who irritates him. The sweet and pure addiction to successful writing. Or is it just another fad...
Anyhow...till later...
